keeping your parents happy

Things to do to keep your parents happy *) (see fine printing below) is basically one thing, to follow whatever they tells you to do **). But in details will be [more less]

1. You should do the manners as they taught you (polite, please and thank you habit for example)
2. When you were little, you must eat whatever they put on your plate and never toy with your food
3. When you study, you must study hard, no play play outside, too distractive for your study. No marble games, no eraser flag wrestling [someone's mum made him to give back all of the erasers (you know who) just like my mum gave away my half bucket marbles]
4. At school you must be the best in class, [someone got scolded for 0.3/100 score drop] [raise your hands if you don't get scolded when your mark slightly drop]
5. After graduation you must get the best job, either make lots and lots of money or to have a PhD degree {this part is sebastien's mum idea of success}
6. Then you must find a nice GF to intro to your parents (if you're a boy). If you're a girl, intro your nice BF la. And if they don't approve the GF/BF, bring the next one and so on ***).
7. Then get married and produce high quality babies {they dun care, must be a good quality one, no question ask}***)

*)Terms and conditions apply
**). if your parents are Asian
***). doable for straight Asians

The following story will be around point 6 and 7. So today, mum asked me to take her for medical check up. It is rather peculiar the fact that it is my fourth day here and she hasn't brought up the "getting married topic". I drop her at the doctors and she said, "you should wait here, don't go anywhere".... half an hour later ...

Mum: "Doctor, this is my son, M"
Me  : "Nice meeting you doc"
Mum: left me with the doctor as she collect her medicine
Doc : "your mum has higher blood pressure today, I talked to her and it seems it has something to do with you being single"
Me  : [pretend smile, how the heck is that has anything to do with me...being single...]
Doc : "you should find a nice indo GF and get married so she can talk to your mum in the kitchen whenever you [both me and future GF] come home"
Me  : [pretend smile ..., I can't do much with bitching, see the list number 1 up there, and the case is totally different with me vs bank]
Doc : "So if you get nice indo GF and get married, your mum will be healthier"
Me  : [the third batch of pretend smile, WTF...!?!?!?!? how can I get a wife will drop mum's hypertension? seriously...!?!?!? I tot that's the whole point of the medicine and the right diet/exercise]
Me  : "well doctor, finding a GF isn't like hoping on the bus you know, where there's number and destination and I can just waive and HOHO (hop on hop off)"
Doc : "Well, but still you've got to try"
Me  : "I'll see what I can do, nice meeting you doc"

Then we left, still not satisfy mum took me to my aunty house {oh puhleasee save me from this misery}

Aunt: "When r u gonna get married? my son is younger than you and he got married already"
Me: "Aunty, I tak laku nii... how?"
Aunt: "Hush, watch your language, and that is impossible, I can..."
Me: I cut before she finished her sentence "I don't want you to hook me up with one of your friend, they are too old for me... noooo...."

Then we left, just now, mum went in to my room and start talking, [I just stay quiet as the topic begins to touch about GF, seriously, again???]

Mum: "So when are you gonna get married?"
Me: [stare]
Mum: "do you have a GF?"
Me: "nope"
Mum: "How about your housemate? is she single"
Me: "my housemate is taken" [no she's not, WTF...!!! leave my housemate alone]
Mum: "you don't have to get rich before getting married you know, dad was poor when he marry me, and you are ready now"
Me: "but that's dad, not me, and there's a period where he left you to marry someone else, for whatever reason I don't know and certainly I don't wanna know"
Mum: "well.."
Me: [stare...] "can we stop"

Seriously... the doctor said if I get married mum's hypertension will drop? WTH... how...? what if [hypothetically I am straight] and my GF is bitchier than me, evidently mum doesn't get along with my sis in-law. WTH... Leave my housemate alone, there's code of ethic, don't date your housemates [hypothetically I am straight]. And I am not my dad. Can't they just leave me alone (even better)***