Wednesday, 29 February 2012

Grindr awkward moments

When I walked out from gym with Ben the other day. I bumped into a guy. I recognise him on grindr. I have been ignoring his messages simply because I have no interest. But then he gave me the stare. The kind of stare when you recognise someone but not so sure what to say kinda thing. I just kept talking to Ben to get rid of my own awkward moment.

It was still awkward...***

Monday, 27 February 2012

get loud silence

I have been trying to exercise for knowing when to shut up and when to say it [out loud]. Which actually starts working [I suppose]. When people come and ask for my opinion, my options is either say it as it is or don't say anything at all it really depends on who I am talking to. The other night Al asked me to meet him for dinner as he has lots of stuffs to tell after I went for 12 days holiday. Mostly about guys he's been dating [what a busy boy]. So I was like, "guys? that's plural you know, and 12 days is not that long, you slut, hahaha...". In his defence, he said guy(s) as in only three and he is only really into one particular one because he can see himself in him.

Saturday, 25 February 2012

updating my bucket list

I has been a while I haven't revisited my bucket list. It's about time to update. Since last update I have done the following:

12 obtain citizenship other than my birth citizenship

44 spend new year eve in an exotic place
This is when I went with Y to New Zealand and having this stupid fireworks display in the fog, we couldn't see the damn thing

45 go on holiday with my best friend
48 visit New Zealand in summer
New Zealand trip as well

50 send out postcard to love ones from places i go
I've been doing it so far

70 go to night club alone and make new friends
this is in bali, I went out alone, managed to make friends with a bartender, two waiters and do something more with twisted twins.


Sunday, 19 February 2012

a night with twisted twins

There is a particular reason why I choose to stay in Seminyak/Legian areas instead of going all the way up in Ubud/Kintamani or down in Jimbaran, Uluwatu, and Nusa Dua or east in Sanur. So if you wanna near beaches with crowd and night clubs and hotties, stay in Seminyak and visit petitenget, double six, and legian beach, they are full of surfer hotties [droll....]. I personally do not like Kuta beach, simply because it is over crowded.

When the night falls, I decided to "experience" what the gay scene of this island has to offer. All gay night clubs are aligned along Jalan Caplak Tanduk in Seminyak area. It's very near to the beach. Do not come before 11pm, still too quiet, tho these gays are always dance even during the day [yap during the day Bali Joe is open]. Ensure yourself to be the inverse of cinderella. Cinderella go home before the party started [before midnight], if you are a party go-er, make sure to arrive after Cinderella gone home okay, don't worry about your ride turned into a pumpkin and mouse, because taxi drivers are always outside the club when you need to go home. Or you may choose the way I did, ride your motorbike [just make sure you are not waay too tipsy when you ride back]

Thursday, 16 February 2012

got caught for borrowing ID

On day two, I re-master riding this bike that I can ride this motorbike while standing and hands off (of course I clutch with half gear). [being show off]. However, after a few days riding motorbike without license and managed to blend in among the convoi, my days without getting screened by police has come to an end. When i ride on this one way road, I saw the big group of police direct the bikers to the side of the road and ask everyone to produce the bike paperwork and the riding license. sigh... nooo... I'm dooom. [or maybe not]

when it comes to my turn I gave only the bike papers. Then the police return it and ask for the license, I gave him my Australian drivers license. The police a bit confused with the color of the license and then he gave it back to me and tell me to go. hahaha... I don't get caught... so I leave lah...

Initially I had a thought of using my brother's license but that'd be stupid if they ask me to take off my helmet and the picture doesn't match.

Speaking of borrowing ID [drifting the story] I recalled one day I went for clubbing with these two girls C and L. L forgot her ID so C kinda tot, "I'll use my passport and you'll use my drivers license, we both asians the guard won't be able to distinguish us anyway". So to speak, apparently it didn't work. It's not that the guard managed to match the picture on the ID, but the guard asked L "so tell me what's your birthday?".... errr.... doom, we couldn't get in. ***

Monday, 13 February 2012

the three nosy aunties

Continuing the post "keeping your parents happy". I made a scene the day before I leave jogja, I'm annoyed enough with this steamy weather, melting, I swim in my own sweat, this time my brother annoys me with lots of questions.

Bro:"soooo, have you got a GF yet?"
Me: [stare...]
Bro:"c'mon tell me"
Me: [stare...]
Bro:"I wonder what is she look like, just show me her pic"
Me:"I'm only gonna tell you this, I'm not gonna get married"
Bro:"whaaaaaaat? Why?"
Me: [the silent act]
Bro:"did a girl broke your heart?"
"did she cheated on you?"
"did she..."
On and on and on with questions but I act silent
"well, let me know when u ready"

Sigh, finally, he shut his mouth, But an hour later I got more from the three aunties [why aunties are so KPo]

Aunty 1: "so have u got a GF?"
Aunty 2: "If you haven't make sure she's Indo"
Aunty 3: "never get a GF that is not Indo, look at Mr.A [her neighbor]" then the example of his failure marriage
Me : "And the three of you preached me about religion, tsk tsk tsk, aunties, I am so disappointed of you, how could you say those things, isn't your religion teach you that all human being are the same despite their look, race, sex, even age, let alone being indo or not indo"

The three of them speechless, hah... finally I managed to shut them up.

Wednesday, 8 February 2012

keeping your parents happy

Things to do to keep your parents happy *) (see fine printing below) is basically one thing, to follow whatever they tells you to do **). But in details will be [more less]
  1. You should do the manners as they taught you (polite, please and thank you habit for example)
  2. When you were little, you must eat whatever they put on your plate and never toy with your food
  3. When you study, you must study hard, no play play outside, too distractive for your study. No marble games, no eraser flag wrestling [someone's mum made him to give back all of the erasers (you know who) just like my mum gave away my half bucket marbles]
  4. At school you must be the best in class, [someone got scolded for 0.3/100 score drop] [raise your hands if you don't get scolded when your mark slightly drop]
  5. After graduation you must get the best job, either make lots and lots of money or to have a PhD degree {this part is sebastien's mum idea of success}
  6. Then you must find a nice GF to intro to your parents (if you're a boy). If you're a girl, intro your nice BF la. And if they don't approve the GF/BF, bring the next one and so on ***).
  7. Then get married and produce high quality babies {they dun care, must be a good quality one, no question ask}***)
*)Terms and conditions apply
**). if your parents are Asian
***). doable for straight Asians
The following story will be around point 6 and 7. So today, mum asked me to take her for medical check up. It is rather peculiar the fact that it is my fourth day here and she hasn't brought up the "getting married topic". I drop her at the doctors and she said, "you should wait here, don't go anywhere".... half an hour later ...

Mum: "Doctor, this is my son, M"
Me  : "Nice meeting you doc"
Mum: left me with the doctor as she collect her medicine
Doc : "your mum has higher blood pressure today, I talked to her and it seems it has something to do with you being single"
Me  : [pretend smile, how the heck is that has anything to do with me...being single...]
Doc : "you should find a nice indo GF and get married so she can talk to your mum in the kitchen whenever you [both me and future GF] come home"
Me  : [pretend smile ..., I can't do much with bitching, see the list number 1 up there, and the case is totally different with me vs bank]
Doc : "So if you get nice indo GF and get married, your mum will be healthier"
Me  : [the third batch of pretend smile, WTF...!?!?!?!? how can I get a wife will drop mum's hypertension? seriously...!?!?!? I tot that's the whole point of the medicine and the right diet/exercise]
Me  : "well doctor, finding a GF isn't like hoping on the bus you know, where there's number and destination and I can just waive and HOHO (hop on hop off)"
Doc : "Well, but still you've got to try"
Me  : "I'll see what I can do, nice meeting you doc"

Then we left, still not satisfy mum took me to my aunty house {oh puhleasee save me from this misery}

Aunt: "When r u gonna get married? my son is younger than you and he got married already"
Me: "Aunty, I tak laku nii... how?"
Aunt: "Hush, watch your language, and that is impossible, I can..."
Me: I cut before she finished her sentence "I don't want you to hook me up with one of your friend, they are too old for me... noooo...."

Then we left, just now, mum went in to my room and start talking, [I just stay quiet as the topic begins to touch about GF, seriously, again???]

Mum: "So when are you gonna get married?"
Me: [stare]
Mum: "do you have a GF?"
Me: "nope"
Mum: "How about your housemate? is she single"
Me: "my housemate is taken" [no she's not, WTF...!!! leave my housemate alone]
Mum: "you don't have to get rich before getting married you know, dad was poor when he marry me, and you are ready now"
Me: "but that's dad, not me, and there's a period where he left you to marry someone else, for whatever reason I don't know and certainly I don't wanna know"
Mum: "well.."
Me: [stare...] "can we stop"

Seriously... the doctor said if I get married mum's hypertension will drop? WTH... how...? what if [hypothetically I am straight] and my GF is bitchier than me, evidently mum doesn't get along with my sis in-law. WTH... Leave my housemate alone, there's code of ethic, don't date your housemates [hypothetically I am straight]. And I am not my dad. Can't they just leave me alone (even better)***

Thursday, 2 February 2012

She's Italian

breakfast with rainbow
Continuing the banging on my window saga, hahaha... That evening I told TC and AP the whole story about the indian girl jumping in to my balcony side and banging my glass wall. Sigh, they're both laughing out loud.

AP: "How can I not hear the intercom?"
M: "You slept like pig that's how, even I tried to wake you up for your class and you still didn't budge"
TC: "Oh so that was the intercom about"
M: "What? you heard it?"
TC: "Yah, but I just had late night shift as well, oh and I plug my ears with earplug when I heard the intercom, hoping one of you guys answer it"
M: [stare...]
AP+TC: Hahahaha...

Yeh evil housemates... the next morning we had breakfast at the balcony as I saw double rainbow over the sky and drag TC out as well. AP, meh he's still snores... Then on the way out to uni, there's girl from unit 3 greet us in the elevator and thank me for helping her jump over to her balcony. While waiting for the bus.

TC: "I been holding this tho, but I wanna laugh"
M: "I know right, I must have been blind"
TC: "HAHAHAHAHA... yah, she's not Indian, she's Italian"
M: "I must have something in my eyes then so I saw something else instead"
TC: "Wah next time yah, if some gilr banging on your window, go toilet and wash your face first la, let those stuffs that stuck on your eyes go away"
TC: "Eh but that's a good thing right, you get to know a girl already, and you'll never know" :p
M: "zzz...."

note TC doesn't know about me being gay, she's very religious so I was thinking to avoid it. so she assume it was a gift...

banging on my window

When I first moved in here to this apartment with AP many years ago, there're strange series of random events happened to me. From the garage door jammed, I had to bring my stuffs through lobby instead, then I got stuck in the elevator in between two floors (doors opened but all i see is the floor slab), heard the old couple next door having sex outloud when I stood at the balcony, got harassed by the chinese uncle next door, but most interesting one was when an indian girl climb up to my balcony. Bear in mind that I live on the roof floor of the building [soul232, no she does not drop from the sky, LOOOL].

I choose the bad time of the year to move in here with AP and TC as I have heaps of overdue reports to write. I moved here for three reasons, one I'm getting close with AP, two it's closer to my part time job, three it's more fun as my boarding house was not as fun anymore for another three reason. one, it's not a good mix like it used to be, two, I don't get closed with new boarding house mates, three, I got mugged by five guys with knife on my neck one night after I finished lab analysis around midnight. (OK, lets stop drifting)

So I just finished drafting another 120 pages report for my professor to read before he leaves to work with NASA in summer. So tired I fell asleep on my bed with my window blinds wide open. I heard the intercom been buzzed like no tomorrow but I can't be bothered to answer it. I know TC usually answered the intercom so I assume she did, AP is just too lazy to get up as always (missing his morning class as usual).

"Thank God the intercom finally stop" I tot so I close my eyes again only last less than 3 minutes then there's loud banging sound on my window. when I opened my eyes, I saw an Indian girl stood up on my balcony and yelling "Please open the door". I was like "WTF, who are you...?" still trying to open my eyes as I only slept for 2 hrs after sending that report online.

I opened my balcony door and she started to lift a plastic chair, I was like "OK girl, you owe me an explanation, and hell, this is like 6 am in the morning, so who are you?". Then the girl said "Oh Uh, my keys, the balcony...". "Hold on, you, who are you?" I stopped her. Then she said, "I am your neighbour on unit 3, I forgot my keys, I tried to buzz your intercom but no answer, so I call unit 1 instead and they let me in, but unit 1 and 3 balconies are not connected, so I borrowed this chair from unit 1 to climb here and I wonder if you could help me to climb to my unit so I can grab my keys". I was still trying to pry my eyes open and walk towards AP's balcony and help her climb and throw that plastic chair to her balcony then went back to bed.

The next day... she's turned out to be Italian, not Indian... I'll tell you in the next post, so sleepy now.... to be continued


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