my middle finger

Dragging myself to work, even worse than usual. Morning feels heavier with cold wind striking in, well it's only few more days till winter. But most of all the heavy weight on my chest, I just wanna get rid off it as quick as I can then move on again with life like I used to. A happy single life. Life has treated me in a very strange way. I wonder why do I get hurt the most by the people I least expected, constantly.

It has been a few days since that post gym conversation outside the courtyard downstairs. I am trying to pull myself together again once more. I feel like answering every question with my middle finger since then. I have been ignoring his messages and only replied with short words. It's painful enough what he said last time and now he's messaging and talking as he never said anything hurtful to me, ah people. If it's too often, it can't be them right? so what is wrong with me?

Today, it's one of those days when I answer every question with my middle finger...

Filling up my days with dense activity for today, Work, French, then I met Steve for dinner after class. Steve is an old friend from uni. We're doing different degree, but he's gay and indo, so we've became good friends when we found some similar issues in life. I haven't seen him for months, time to get some juicy stories out of him :D . At least it'll keep my mind off stuffs. Gah, I just want this to get over with.

On the side note, one of my biggest crush just came out of the closet to me today, just before we heads out for coffee. At least something good happen, but I'm not his type as usual. And he agrees about the barista.***